R-241 part 5: escalating reminders, and operator levers for a running countdown

REMINDERS (SEC 2.3). The offer epoch now stamps when it began, and the
undecided reminder escalates in EMPHASIS at 1, 3, 7 and 14 days.

THE READING IS STATED BECAUSE THE SPEC IS AMBIGUOUS, and it is written into
the code where it can be corrected. For an ABANDONING box, 5/3/1 are
unambiguously days REMAINING before a deletion. An undecided box has no
deadline - nothing counts down to anything, because SEC 7.5 deliberately does
NOT auto-abandon - so 14/7/3/1 cannot be "remaining" and are taken as days
ELAPSED, with the wording firming up rather than the bar appearing and
disappearing. If the operator meant something else, one function changes.

The stamp is re-set on every entry into the offered state, so a box that
settles and is later rebuilt starts its ladder again instead of inheriting an
old one.

OPERATOR LEVERS (SEC 7.5). --abandon-status, --abandon-extend=N and
--abandon-stop on the controller CLI, beside the existing operator
subcommands. They exist because the path that ACTUALLY happens is the customer
telephoning, and support needs something to press.

They live on the CLI and not in the customer UI deliberately: extending a
deletion the customer asked for is an operator judgement, and a customer who
wants it stopped already has the self-service route - they recover with their
code, which cancels it.

BOTH REFUSE RATHER THAN NO-OP, in two situations: when no countdown is
running, and when the store has already been deleted. A silent success is the
thing an operator most easily mistakes for "handled" - they would tell the
customer their data was safe when it is gone. Pinned by two tests.

--abandon-extend counts from NOW, not from the old due date, and a test proves
the old date passes without deleting anything.

Green: go build, go vet, go test ./... all pass; controller gates OK.

controller/internal/backup/offbox_abandon.go

@@ -218,3 +218,56 @@ func (m *Manager) ClearAbandonPurgeIfConfirmed(supersededPresent bool) {
 	}
 	m.logger.Printf("[INFO] [offbox] abandonment COMPLETE — the set-aside history and the sealed package that protected it are both gone; nothing further to ask about")
 }
+
+// ── OPERATOR CONTROL (§7.5) ─────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────────
+//
+// The automatic 30-day abandonment is deliberately NOT built (see R-245). What IS built is the path
+// that actually happens: **the customer gets in touch.** Someone who cannot find their recovery code
+// rings support, and support needs something to press — either "give them longer" or "stop it".
+//
+// Both live on the controller CLI rather than in the customer UI, deliberately: extending a deletion
+// the customer asked for is an operator judgement, not a self-service button, and a customer who
+// wants it stopped already has the self-service route — they recover with their code, which cancels
+// it (Scenario G).
+
+// ExtendAbandon pushes the terminal step out by `days` from NOW. Returns the new due date.
+//
+// It refuses when no countdown is running: extending nothing would print a reassuring date for a
+// deletion that was never scheduled, which is the kind of comfort this project keeps removing.
+func (m *Manager) ExtendAbandon(days int) (time.Time, error) {
+	if days <= 0 {
+		return time.Time{}, fmt.Errorf("the extension must be a positive number of days")
+	}
+	st := m.AbandonStatus()
+	if !st.Active {
+		if st.PurgeRequested {
+			return time.Time{}, fmt.Errorf("too late: the set-aside history has already been deleted and only the sealed package is still being removed")
+		}
+		return time.Time{}, fmt.Errorf("no abandonment countdown is running on this box — nothing to extend")
+	}
+	due := m.abandonNow().UTC().AddDate(0, 0, days)
+	if err := m.settings.UpdateOffboxStatus(func(o *settings.OffboxTarget) {
+		o.AbandonAt = due.Format(time.RFC3339)
+	}); err != nil {
+		return time.Time{}, fmt.Errorf("record the extension: %w", err)
+	}
+	m.logger.Printf("[WARN] [offbox] abandonment EXTENDED by an operator: the set-aside history at %s is now deleted on %s (was %s)",
+		st.RepoPath, due.Format("2006-01-02"), st.DueAt.Format("2006-01-02"))
+	return due, nil
+}
+
+// StopAbandon cancels the countdown outright — the operator's version of Scenario G, for the
+// customer who telephoned instead of finding their code. The set-aside history is kept and nothing
+// is deleted; it is `CancelAbandon` with an operator's reason and a refusal when nothing is running,
+// so an operator never gets a silent no-op they might read as success.
+func (m *Manager) StopAbandon() error {
+	st := m.AbandonStatus()
+	if !st.Active {
+		if st.PurgeRequested {
+			return fmt.Errorf("too late: the set-aside history has already been deleted")
+		}
+		return fmt.Errorf("no abandonment countdown is running on this box — nothing to stop")
+	}
+	m.CancelAbandon("stopped by an operator")
+	return nil
+}